A-Dult

I think we would always be ourselves despite the fact we have grow up to be adults. Adults who has a sense of logical thinking, a reasonable stance in matters, decision makers so on and so forth. We will still be our little self aeons ago. To quote a friend,

"Do we really grow into adults or are we who we are all along? I feel like I am still the same person I was 10, 20, 25 years ago"

The point is do we really grow into a better person? Resolutions after resolutions we loathe the fact that a new year is coming around, creeping into our fantasies. I'm not a saint, not as upright and moral that I seem to be. Truth, I'm a douche, opportunist and a cunt, and I try to deviate that as much as possible to be a better man.

Still the same things happens over and over again. I'm sorry for myself.

The fact.

Brighter Discontent II

The last time I wrote on this particular topic, it was more of dismissing a person I thought I knew in the past. From the recent string of events have rendered me restless. Bounded and gagged, is what I am feeling now. Jaded, I think I am much more melodramatic compared to last time.

Yesterday, I was offered a job in the creative team, a copywriter, under a very experienced creative director and the most shocking revelation is I was actually recommended by my other boss. I've already settled for the fact I am not capable of writing flawless language, but why now? Why not when I needed help the most, people do not come to my aid?

I'm sick and tired to be presented 2 options all the time. I hate to make decisions like this, reluctance on to linger to the other option, yet feared of making the wrong decisions. The long nights of tormenting myself thinking, I was given a shot yet I feared them profusely.